Life is like a roller coaster. Just hold on tight when it's going down.

Monday, February 21, 2011

21/02/2011

Because I fear..

Hello peeps!

Long while since I blogged, kind of hard when you are JC2 student with a competition season coming up. I can feel my body breaking down from all the 'wear and tear'.

School is starting to swing at me with full force and I still haven't got used to it. I seem to be anticipating every weekend or break I could get, it's as if I can't wait to get out, somewhat true though... but still :/

I am supposed to be studying for Econs test now, but I just finished watching the All-Star Game today so I shall give myself some buffer time before I continue to do work, might even write to my angel while I am at it.

Floorball 'A' Div is starting soon and I am getting more and more nervous as the day for the cut for 16 and 8 comes.... Talking about this, I have to sms training timings and days. HAIZ.

Perhaps I really losing confidence in myself, but nonetheless, I've been stagnating since god knows how long?! Karma? Maybe, but I really want to play and play well during 'A' Div. My goal has remained the same throughout: Top 4 for 'A' Div. Nothing less. It's what drives me to play with an injured wrist or a sprained ankle. I should make a note for the retards from floorball before the results are released for the 16 and 8 playing. :/

On a different and random topic, I am beginning to feel like a masked man all of a sudden. Perhaps not that I would like it, but it's the only way to keep things in 'harmony' I suppose. I try as much to be myself, but sometimes, things and fate and life and all the other random stuff just disallows it. It calls for me to be someone I don't want to be. And for the matters of love, I can't even be bothered to think about it anymore. Too tired and too much to consider regarding such stuff. Perhaps I am thinking too much. As always.

Hoping TF's CCA stuff faster ends so that we can study together quickly. I am getting scared for exams now too. ):

I thought I had a lot to say, but it didn't seem that way in the end huh? Perhaps I answered some of the stuff I wanted to speak out inside of me. Perhaps I forgotten about it while those that are not forgotten nor answered goes to my blog. YAY!

My blog is not dead, is just sleepy (: *hints at someone*

Because holding on is so much easier than letting go, because it's much easier to feed yourself false hopes that it is to go through the pain. But I believe, going through the motion, is much more satisfying. It's not about the result, it's about the process.

That's all for today,
See Ya~

I'm still breathing;
6:01 PM

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

2/2/2011

Recap

Hi peeps!

It's Chinese New Year Eve! (: I was kind of pissed off by my parents this morning, but oh well , the day ended well and WILL END WELL. First time, in my 17 years of life, has my dad ask me to stay up late. LIKE WOW. He literally said, I could choose not to sleep today. So well, seeing I have so much time to burn, I am here to blog! (:

I went to visit DSCC, my ex-tuition centre/before-and-after-school-care center after so long. Well, they sort of invited me to go for reunion dinner on Tuesday but I had training and I couldn't make it. So, I delibrately made a trip down on Monday. Just to see, how's everything going there.

Pretty shocked by the attitude of kids nowadays, after hearing all the stories from my ex-tuition teacher. Apparently, kids nowadays dare to throw chairs and slam tables when they are pissed off. Mind you, we are talking about primary school kids here ._. Of course, being an 'alumni', I did try to help. I was pretty surprised by my own patience with those kids then. I usually go for the 'black face method' to try and help. After that, I sat down abit to help out. Let's just put it this way, the innocence of kids really threw me off balance for a while. I would talk about this later, but yeah, it did.

Training on Tuesday was fun. Even for some slackers :P Well, I think when teams bond together, even the toughest of trainings can be fun ba. Perhaps things would get even better going forward. SIXTEEN!!!!! D:

Well, today was just, lame. Like seriously. I stayed throughout the entire CNY celebration of HC for no good reason, when I could've been at CHS talking with close friends of mine. Although I did ended up playing some ball, but it was all good at least.

Anyway, my trip to my ex-tuition center sort of made me felt abit, I dont know, uneasy? After studying in HC for a year, I am becoming easily uptight and ticked off. Because of what I've experienced, I tend to jump to conclusions quickly. You can hardly blame me, I've never gotten such crap before. I used to be a lot more carefree, and definitely, trusting.

Now? Uh-uh, not so much. I was talking to innocent little kids and I actually didn't let my guard down, afraid of what they might do or say. Until it hit me, THEY ARE INNOCENT. LIKE TOTALLY UNSURE OF HOW AND WHAT WOULD HAPPEN. Instead, kids look to NOW. I wish to go back to that state too. ): I didn't get to talk face-to-face with any of my close friends. That sucks. Although I have to thank WeiXian for dinner and that LOOOONG crap talk last week, there are things that still bug me, which I forgot to mention to him.

HAIZ.

I feel like I am growing OLDER. Not really, maturing but rather OLD. Let's hope things would turn out for the better after CNY. I will keep my fingers crossed.

The innocence of young and unpolluted mind. The complexity of a experienced one. Who would have thought, 1 year in a particular education system, could change so much?

That's all for today,
See Ya~

I'm still breathing;
9:23 PM